When I announced it was teatime and asked my grandparents if they would like to join me. My grandmother demurred but my granddad had a question.
Him: Do you have crumpets?
Me (already amused): No, I don’t have any crumpets, Granddad. Anyway, do you even know what a crumpet is?
Him: No. But I know you're supposed to have them with tea.
When I walked into my grandmother’s bedroom and she gave me a strange look (not an uncommon occurrence these days since she has dementia).
Me: How are you feeling, Grandmother?
Her: You have hips.